Thursday, January 31, 2013


I have had a lot of thoughts going through my head lately.
Weird, deep,thoughtful, profound, scary, mournful, funny, silly and insane thoughts just to name a few.
I also have been thinking a lot what to do now that my kids are getting older I find my self lonely a lot in this big house with no kids during the day.
I don't want to get a job because I want to be available for my kids if they need me.
I have been thinking about volunteering  I just need to find the right place to do so.
I also have been thinking of  becoming a yoga instructor.
I really need something.

I also keep thinking about running a half marathon it is one of my goals this year I just need to find the right one.
It took me a while but I love running it's a part of who I am now. I think a lot about what a hard journey it was to love running I am glad I stuck with it because I found out I am really good at it.

William has been in my thoughts a lot lately I miss him so much it's hard to breath sometimes.

I also think of how much I miss my oldest daughter Kadie and her family, I really wish they lived closer.

My Brother Carl has been in my thoughts a lot too sometimes it feels like he is dead not in prison for a crime he did not commit.
I also think what a chicken I am not to go see him I just cant bring myself to see him in such an awful place.

My thoughts turn often to if I am a good mom, I know I am a OK my but am I a good mom.
So many thought I tell you and when I run with out music I get more.
So there you have it a gimps into my thoughts.


  1. Sometimes my mind never shuts off. It's so hard to know what to do about all the things you think about. As far as my two cents, I think you'd be a great yoga instructor, and I think you are a fantastic mom.

  2. All I can say is if you ever decide to make that visit I will go with you. I will ride in the car and laugh and sing off key and wait for you while you do. (Of course I don't even know if that's possible since I don't know where he is - but I totally would!

  3. My mind is overloaded with thoughts too.. So much going on and some days I can't process it at all. One of the reasons my blog is lacking is because I just can't think of what to say half the time. Not because I have nothing to say, but because my mind is so full of thoughts and it's hard to come up with a complete post. But soon!