Monday, July 29, 2013

9 years ago today my water broke 5 weeks early. .

I remember it like it was yesterday I was 35 weeks pregnant with Been I was mislabel and tiered of poking myself with a needle each night because I had Gestational diabetes.
That morning I went to my  bi weekly non stress test and ultrasound, everything looked great that morning.
I came home cleaned the house then we went out for dinner.
2 hours later my water broke, I was a little scared but excited to meet Ben.
I was prepared that he would be going to the NICU for weeks because of the diabetes but I was not prepared for him to be so early.
I did not have contractions after my water broke so we opted to have pittouson  you would think with 6 prior birth's I would have had it before.
This was my first time and let me tell you it was awful.
It was the longest labor I ever had.
Yet worth every minute of it.
Mr. Ben was born at he had the weakest cry but it was sweet .
I only got to see him a moment be fore they wished him away.
He was so tiny but I remember thinking he had the biggest hands I had ever seen on a newborn.
I did not get to hold him for a few hours because of all the work he needed to get him stable.
Seeing him in the NICU for the first time was hard he had so machines and wires hooked to him.
His heart rate kept dropping a lot  but when I walked in and started taking his heart rate would start back up to where it needed to be.
I was scared to hold him the first time in the NICU but excited at the same time,
The moment he was in my arms he captured my heart and to this day he still owns it.
Despite what Maddie says I don't love him more than the other kids and he is not my favorite child but I would be lying if I did not say he has my heart wrapped around his sweet smile.
He make's me happy every day he is balm,  to my broken heart when William died, he makes me laugh every day he makes me laugh and brings me to tears every year he gets older I feel that he is my bonus child my special gift from heavenly father.
I love this boy so much and I am so glad he chose me to be his mommy.


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